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So what would you like to achieve in your family relationships in 2011?

December 7, 2010

I’ve been writing my goals for 2011 and I really enjoy taking my time – reviewing my past year, celebrating my big and small successes, analysing my disappointments and my  limiting beliefs about myself and analysing things that keep me stuck, swirling or feeling  a failure. I really enjoy writing down my new dreams, my new goals and some new ways of thinking about my Life for the New Year.

It’s a habit I developed after going to Florida a couple of years ago to do “Date With Destiny” with Tony Robbins – which I found to be truly liberating, inspiring and transformational.

One interesting exercise I enjoy doing is to review the various roles I play in my life.

I am a Mum, Writer, Coach, Expert, Wife, Taxi Driver, Chief Cheer Leader for Family and Friends, Social Secretary for my Family , Business Woman, Friend, Mentor, Chelsea FC Fan, Cook, Entrepreneur,  Role Model to my Kids, Film Lover, Self Developer, Radio and TV Broadcaster,  Reiki Healer, Leader, Party Animal and A Force of Nature!

They are not necessarily in any particular order but it’s interesting to write them all out.

So grab a piece of paper and a pen and get pondering……

What Are Your Roles?

It can be fascinating to think about what your roles are. And I think it’s helpful to remember that they change depending on the stages of Life that you find yourself in, and change with the age of your children or family circumstances.

 Here are some questions to get you thinking:

  • What are your current responsibilities?
  • What are you accountable for in your life?
  • What role do you play during the day?  At weekends?
  • What would you call the role you are playing as you are doing each of those activities?
  • Are you happy with your roles?
  • What roles would you like to change, relinquish or delegate?
  • What roles are you happiest playing?
  • What roles would you like to change, give up or stop playing?

You might want to consider some roles that are not being fully used.  For example, as a parent, would you like your relationship with your kids to be stronger?  Would you like to be a more fun or proactive partner? Better son or daughter to your own parents or a more compassionate boss perhaps?

  • What roles do you want to add to your life in the next year?

Write them down as I think it gives you better clarity.

It’s also a good idea to limit yourself to about 6 roles in your life to stop yourself feeling overwhelmed.

“Looking at your life from the perspective of the roles you play provides a sensible way of integrating the various areas of your life while placing yourself and your values at the centre, directing the show.”
—Jinny S. Ditzler, Best Year Yet

As you think of each role, close your eyes and just daydream about each role and think about how it looks, how it feels and how it sounds to you.

Then breathing deeply and slowly just imagine how you would ideally like to play each role next year.

Not many parents plan their next year with their kids, family or work colleagues.

So why not join the “2% ers” as my friend Andy Cope (Author of The Spy Dog series of   books for kids and inspirational owner of The Art Of Being Brilliant)  calls people who plan?

I wrote my Parenting CD The parental journey audio CD & ideas book with this theme in mind because:

“Failing to plan is planning to fail”

~Alan Lakein

Let me know what you discover and feel free to post up your thoughts on my blog  and if you’d like to explore this theme further Check out this Goal Setting Template for 2011 from Personal Success Factors

Download your copy of Sue’s Ebook
How to give your kids the gift of self-esteem by clicking here

About the author

Sue Atkins is a Parenting Expert who offers practical guidance for bringing up happy, confident, well behaved children. She is also the author of “Raising Happy Children for Dummies” one in the  famous black and yellow series published worldwide and the highly acclaimed Parenting Made Easy CDs. She regularly appears on BBC Breakfast and The Jeremy Vine Show on BBC Radio 2 and her parenting articles are published all over the world.

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Sue Atkins the Parenting Expert
T: + 44 1342 833355   M: 07740 622769

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. December 7, 2010 10:09 pm

    Great post, Sue! One of the suggestions Ms. Ditzler gives is to see also if some of your roles can be combined. That makes it a little easier to keep track of all of them. And I like the idea of taking the time to close our eyes, breathe, and imagine our roles as we’d like them to be once we’re living them out ideally.

    • December 8, 2010 9:04 am

      I what a great idea to see if you can combine the roles ….. makes life easier and hopefully more enriching !

      Love your writing and your work Steve !

      Thanks for posting


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